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<\/p>\nSomebody drops a glass in a pub. The correct reaction is:<\/p>\n
1. <\/b>Ignore it and carry on with your drink.
2. <\/b>Cheer loudly and clap.
3. <\/b>Immediately rush over and offer to help to clear it up. How mortifying!<\/p>\n
This simple test is a great way to spot the out-of-towners (the correct answer is 2). But it\u2019s just one of many great British life lessons that await the Democrat-supporting celebrities who have threatened to pack their bags and move across the Pond after the US election. The Ugly Betty star America Ferrera has even reportedly been looking at schools in Barnes, southwest London, for her young children, saying she is \u201csick\u201d that Trump has been re-elected. The actresses Sophie Turner and Minnie Driver have recently upped sticks and moved back to their country of birth.<\/p>\n
The UK won\u2019t be a mystery to any of them. London is one of New York\u2019s closest cultural cousins. But Barnes is a long way from Blackpool; a week treading the red carpet in Leicester Square is not the same as a bank holiday in actual Leicester; New England has considerably nicer-looking autumn leaves than the place that gave it its name. <\/p>\n
There are certain terms of engagement for life on our small island, especially when it comes to holidays. Brits love to travel \u2014 we made 86.2 million visits abroad in 2023, incredible given we\u2019re a nation of about 70 million \u2014 and we\u2019re very idiosyncratic while we\u2019re at it. <\/p>\n
So before Hollywood\u2019s finest settle for a life in our, er, sunlit uplands, here\u2019s the wisdom of a thirtysomething travel writer about how to holiday like a true Brit.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Blackpool is a quintessentially British holiday destination<\/p>\n
ALAMY<\/p>\n
1. <\/b>At various points in the year there is TRAVEL CHAOS. Usually on the last Friday of the summer term and in May and October (half-term). Everyone will be in a lather and it\u2019s your duty to get to the airport\/ferry terminal\/Eurostar station six hours in advance to wait for whatever it is you\u2019re boarding to be delayed. But \u2026<\/p>\n
2. <\/b>\u2026 at least you can buy a bottle of prosecco in the Gatwick Wetherspoons at 5am to keep you company.<\/p>\n
\u2022 Travel chaos 2024: all the strikes and disruption expected across Europe<\/b><\/a><\/p>\n 3. <\/b>We Brits all say we hate the budget airline Ryanair, even though it carried more than 180 million passengers last year. It\u2019s why everyone claps when the plane lands. Just bring only your\u2026 fanny pack, is it?<\/p>\n 4. <\/b>We also love to complain about British Airways, the UK\u2019s flag carrier, for any and all reasons, but the usual objections are food: the crap snacks in economy, and the fact that there is no longer a three-course dinner menu in business class after 9pm. The bonus is that it serves free and unlimited booze, which will startle our more puritanical American friends.<\/p>\n 5. <\/b>And if you\u2019re flying to the Costa del Sol, be prepared to wake up at dawn to nab a sunbed. The likelihood of you finding one after breakfast is as likely as the DFS Furniture sale ever ending.<\/p>\n \u2022 Love it or hate it, this holiday tradition is on its way out<\/b><\/a><\/p>\n 6. <\/b>We don\u2019t go in for big border walls \u2014 the last one we built, Hadrian\u2019s, was nearly 2,000 years ago. Instead there is rather an attitude at the UK frontier, where you will be made to feel like you\u2019ve done something illegal just because you dared hand over your passport still in its holder.<\/p>\n 7. <\/b>A staycation is just another word for a holiday in the UK.<\/p>\n A full English breakfast is a must for any visitor to these shores<\/p>\n GETTY IMAGES<\/p>\n 8. <\/b>Hotels will often throw in a free breakfast as we get very grumpy without one<\/a>. That breakfast must be a buffet that includes baked beans and proper coffee; don\u2019t even think about asking for that filtered muck.<\/p>\n 9. <\/b>A decent hotel room will probably have a Nespresso machine and proper teabags. At the very least we expect a kettle \u2014 none of this microwaved tea malarkey. And most importantly \u2014 deep breath \u2014 you don\u2019t need to tip the staff.<\/p>\n 10. <\/b>Best leave the giant RV at home. Our tiny coastal roads have no room for them. Caravan holidays on this side of the Pond will involve a towbar and maybe a disco where everyone dances the Macarena. <\/p>\n 11. <\/b>Unfortunately, to go on that staycation, the trains will often be late, on strike, too busy, filthy, or all of the above. Britain\u2019s watercooler moments will typically involve a story about a terrible journey because of a signal failure, a broken-down train, the fact that we had to sit by the loos for 90 minutes. <\/p>\n 12. <\/b>Prepare to dip into your inheritance to fund the train fare to the Cotswolds\/Highlands\/Cornwall. An open-return ticket from London to Manchester will cost the same as a week\u2019s rent in the latter (as I found out this week). A bus journey is now up to \u00a33, even if you want to go two stops \u2014 oh, and the next one is Tuesday week. <\/p>\n 13. <\/b>Even so, there\u2019s nothing quite like the camaraderie of the last train from London to the suburbs (Victoria to Dartford, say) on a Friday night where you\u2019ll find people singing and eating Happy Meals.<\/p>\n Head to Brighton when the sun comes out<\/p>\n GETTY IMAGES<\/p>\n 14. <\/b>When the sun shines you must immediately take off almost all layers and find the last pub garden that still has a table not in the shade. Even if it\u2019s March and 14C. If it\u2019s the weekend, it\u2019s the law to take the train to Brighton\/Tenby\/Whitby and shiver through a \u201clovely\u201d lunch of fish and chips on the beach.<\/p>\n \u2022 28 of the UK\u2019s most stylish hotels by the beach<\/b><\/a><\/p>\n 15. <\/b>The UK is actually four different countries. Don\u2019t confuse them. And on that note, there are a lot of dialects. A bread roll at the breakfast buffet can be a cob, a roll, a bun, a barm, a batch or a bap. Which is impressive given it\u2019s just flour, water and yeast.<\/p>\n 16.<\/b> It\u2019s true that Brits can be negative, cynical and throw bits of casual abuse at each other. It\u2019s all good-natured and actually means we have deep affection for you\/whatever it is (see Ryanair, British Airways \u2026 and even trains).<\/p>\n What have we missed? Let us know in the comments below<\/p>\n Become a subscriber<\/a> and, along with unlimited digital access to The Times and The Sunday Times, you can enjoy a collection of travel offers and competitions curated by our trusted travel partners, especially for Times+ members<\/p>\n Sign up for our Times Travel newsletter<\/a> and follow us on Instagram<\/a> and X<\/a><\/p>\n![\"A](\"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/\/methode\/times\/prod\/web\/bin\/19719e9d-b6c5-4c2d-9115-d90c0b40d765.jpg\")
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