On a scale of a Long Island Iced Tea to a Manhattan on the rocks, where does Summer House’s Kyle Cooke fit? This is NYQ, a series in which we find out how “New York” notable New Yorkers really are.
How many years have you lived in New York? 17 years, if I’m doing my math.
You could make one subway etiquette rule law — what would it be? Let people out before you enter. It’s very simple.
Someone bumps into you on the subway — what do you do? You give them the finger, start a war. No — I’m just kidding. You just go about your business.
Your cab driver is taking you on a horrible route. Do you interrupt? Absolutely. I’m like, “Sir, there’s a better way. I’m happy to hop on Google Maps for you.” I’m very a vocal backseat driver.
How often do you take public transportation to the airport? It’s been a minute. Back in the day, when I was a broke-ass entrepreneur, I took the subway — you gotta take the bus to La Guardia. I don’t miss those days.
Someone tries to hand you a flyer on the street — what do you do? Sometimes I’ll look at the flyer. I feel for those people — that’s a hustle.
It’s a blinking red light and you’re about to cross — do you wait it out till it says walk, or are you crossing? I just look both ways. Doesn’t matter what the light’s doing.
What’s something a tourist does that you secretly still do? I love the museums. I’d do Ellis Island again. Actually, I’ve yet to do Statue of Liberty. I don’t know how.
Would you rather transfer trains or walk farther? I don’t mind a transfer, especially if it’s hot or cold out. I’ll probably wait it out.
Someone says the rats are actually cute — what’s your honest response? The rats are just part of New York City. You just gotta accept them.
Someone you want to impress asks for restaurant advice — what neighborhood do you send them to for the best Chinese food? I’d actually tell them to go to Chinese Tuxedo.
Have you ever actually been to Staten Island? Yes — actually, I did Hurricane Sandy cleanup there. That was the first time I’d ever been.
What’s your area code? 917.
Do you think they still matter? Absolutely.
Do you feel prideful of yours? Yeah, people think it’s cool. I used to really want a 212.
Bedbugs or roaches? Probably a cockroach, because I can just kill them.
Roaches or rats? Probably a cockroach. Rats are like a roommate.
Do you call Manhattan “the city” or just Manhattan? Our new show is In the City — I think that’s what people say.
How do you get out East? I have a car. The traffic’s kind of brutal, but I like having the independence of my own car.
Have you ever taken the Blade? Yes, taken a Blade. But once you get there, you’re beholden to Ubers and all that stuff.
What’s your go-to public bathroom? There’s actually public bathrooms in Union Square that aren’t too bad.
What about NYC still makes no sense to you? How the heck is rent almost just as expensive in Brooklyn? I don’t quite understand the advantage.
Would you move to Brooklyn? No. I don’t get the allure.
You know you’re a New Yorker when … The first time it’s over 50 degrees and you just want to rage all day.
What’s a place that closed that you wish you could bring back? Tenjune.
Last time you ate a hot dog from a hot-dog stand? No joke — like a month ago, at three in the morning.
Last time you hailed a yellow cab? Pretty recently. I feel like Uber’s really ruined this city — I just spent $70 to cross town last night. Absurd.
What percent did you tip your last Uber driver? Look, it’s not like they’re waiting on me. I tend to be in the teens.
What’s the most you’ve ever paid for a coffee in New York City? Probably like nine or ten bucks.
How many times have you moved in New York City? Financial District, Flatiron, Nolita, back to Fidi — so four times.
Which was the worst move? My very first move, in ’07. I was driving a U-Haul down the FDR, missed the low-clearance signs, and suddenly realized I was about to go under an overpass that was too low. The cops had to escort me off an on-ramp.