Tracee Ellis Ross is reflecting on Oprah‘s comments about her ongoing single status.
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The moment came in an episode of Tracee’s new series, Solo Traveling With Tracee Ellis Ross, which finds the Emmy-winning actor exploring the joys of the world as a single and childless woman.
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Reflecting on the freedom of solo travel, Tracee said, “So much of what traveling is about, is for me, not waiting for something in order to walk towards my life, in order to be in my life, in order to experience my life. I think that was why I took my first trip solo. And I know that in some ways — I mean, Oprah said it. She said that I’m the poster child for singledom. I don’t want to be that.”
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Instead, Tracee prefers to reframe the conversation as someone living on their own terms and not waiting for traditional things to add value and meaning to their life. “I want to be the poster child for being an inhabitant in your own skin,” Tracee said. “For living in your own skin.”
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Although some might see being single and childless at an older age as a negative, Tracee, 52, says it has afforded her a freedom and an experience that she might not have otherwise had.
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“Yes, I am a single Black woman who does not have children, but not having a relationship — long, long relationships — not having children has allowed me to explore things of my own humanity,” she reflected. “It has deposited me here at 52 in an extraordinary experience that is filled with joy, loneliness, grief, exuberance, delight, like, literally all of it. And I feel available to it.”
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While Tracee didn’t specify when Oprah’s comments occurred, they appear to be from a 2020 interview on her Your Life in Focus series, where Oprah told Tracee how many single women view her as “an example of what being an unmarried woman could and should look like.”
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When asked if she ever imagined playing that role, Tracee laughed, “No. I, like many of us, was taught to grow up dreaming of my wedding, not of my life.”
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She added, “I spent many years dreaming of my wedding, and also, waiting to be chosen. Well, here’s the thing. I’m the chooser. And I can choose to get married if I want to, but in the meantime, I am choicefully single, happily, gloriously single.”
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She repeated that message in a 2021 interview with Harper’s Bazaar: “People are like, ‘You’re the poster child for being single.’ And I was like, ‘Great.’ But what I would prefer is that I’m the poster child for living my life on my terms. And that there’s a version of that for everyone. I don’t live my life for other people. I just totally live it for me.”
You can (and should!) watch Solo Traveling With Tracee Ellis Ross now on Roku. Trust me when I say — it’s great. Let me know what you think of her reflections in the comments below, too.
BuzzFeed contacted representatives for Oprah for comment, but didn’t immediately hear back.
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