Arlington mother Iesha Mustafa hoped to quickly find a good role model for her 10-year-old son, Isaiah Hassell, through the Big Brothers Big Sisters program.
After two years of waiting, her hopes dwindled.
“I thought they forgot about us,” she said.
Isaiah was one of more than 400 children sitting on the Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Tarrant waitlist. Delays caused by a shortage of male mentors have left boys waiting twice as long on average for a mentor than girls.
The male mentor shortage is not new, said Maeve Mitchell, community engagement manager for Big Brothers Big Sisters.
Kids typically want a mentor who is the same gender, Mitchell said.
Boys typically wait a year longer on average for a mentor than girls, Mitchell said. Nearly three-quarters of the waitlist are boys, but most mentors are women.
Recruiting campaigns have been used to try and convince more men to sign on as mentors, Mitchell said.
Big Brothers Big Sisters is recruiting men through social media, networking events and partnership fronts, Mitchell said. However, most volunteer after their friends convince them, she added.
So far this year, 112 men volunteered compared to 240 women.
As a child in the mid-2000s, Mitchell was paired with a Big Sister fairly quickly, she said.
Her younger brother, who was 6 or 7, signed up around the same time. He was on the waitlist for three years before their mom pulled his application, Mitchell said.
Some men see mentoring as a feminine role so they don’t volunteer, Mitchell said.
Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Tarrant community engagement manager Maeve Mitchell sits at her desk in Arlington on Aug. 28, 2025. (John Forbes | Fort Worth Report)
Doug Hadley, a 56-year-old father of five, volunteered after meeting a friend’s mentee at a wedding.
“I just felt I still had time and patience to give,” Hadley said.
Hadley was paired with 12-year-old Zayden Roberts on Christmas Day in 2023 after only a few weeks of waiting. The nearly two years they have spent together has been filled with rodeos, sporting events, food and endless video calls.
Hadley said he sees that Zayden is happier, more confident and even performing better in school as a result of their time together.
Zayden’s mother, April Roberts, said she sees the change, too.
“Zayden is just flourishing,” she said.
Iesha Mustafa, center, and her three sons, from left, Ali Trigg, Isaiah and Isaac Hassell, pose for a photo in the Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Tarrant County Arlington office on Sept. 17, 2025. (John Forbes | Fort Worth Report)
As for Isaiah, now 12, he finally met his new mentor on Sept. 4.
Mustafa signed up her youngest children 10 months after Isaiah. They’re still waiting, but Mustafa has renewed hope.
Want to become a mentor?
Big Brothers Big Sisters is seeking mentors. You can apply here.
Interested in getting a mentor for your child? Go here.
John Forbes is a reporting fellow for the Fort Worth Report. Contact him at john.forbes@fortworthreport.org.
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