{"id":641309,"date":"2026-03-08T16:31:13","date_gmt":"2026-03-08T16:31:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/641309\/"},"modified":"2026-03-08T16:31:13","modified_gmt":"2026-03-08T16:31:13","slug":"snl-cold-open-lambasts-donald-trump-pete-hegseth-over-war-in-iran","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/641309\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2018SNL\u2019 Cold Open Lambasts Donald Trump & Pete Hegseth Over War in Iran"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Saturday Night Live<\/a>\u00a0cold open lambasted President Donald Trump<\/a> and Secretary of War Pete Hegseth<\/a> over the war in Iran \u2014 also addressing Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem<\/a>\u2018s firing, in the process.<\/p>\n

On the Saturday, March 7, episode of SNL,\u00a0Colin Jost<\/a> reprised his role as Hegseth. His portrayal once again featured an overly aggressive, college frat boy vibe.<\/p>\n

Hegseth took questions from reporters at a press conference after doing a keg stand to offer updates about the war in Iran<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs you may have seen from our epic Pentagon meme drops, we\u2019re treating Iran like the breathalyzer in my car and blowing it the hell up,\u201d Jost, as Hegseth, declared. \u201cThe good news is, our operation couldn\u2019t be going better, and everyone loves it. To quote my personal hero, Papa Roach, \u201cCut Iran into pieces. Make it a Trump resort.\u201d<\/p>\n

Next, Hegseth shared, \u201cWe\u2019re giving Iran a third-degree purple nurple, all right? And we torpedoed their ships so bad, their Navy\u2019s gonna be singing, \u2018Under the sea.\u2019 Yeah, that\u2019s right. We can do Jamaican again. You\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/p>\n

The secretary of war also interrupted a question from a reporter to clarify the situation involving ongoing attacks from the U.S. and Israel on Iran.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhoever called this a war?\u201d Hegseth pointed out. \u201cExcept maybe the president a couple times accidentally, OK? This isn\u2019t a war. Also, why do we have to put labels on everything, OK? What are you, my high school girlfriend? Which I had.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hegseth continued, \u201cThis isn\u2019t a war. It\u2019s a situationship, right? We\u2019re just gonna hook up. We\u2019re gonna see where it goes. If it feels good, we\u2019ll keep going. And if we get bored, we\u2019ll start hooking up with Cuba.\u201d<\/p>\n

After a reporter asked if there would be \u201cboots on the ground\u201d in Iran, Hegseth shot back, \u201cUh, yeah. Your mom\u2019s next to my bed after I bang her.\u201d<\/p>\n

Finally, Hegseth introduced Noem for the last time, selling reporters, \u201cAfter year, singular, of hard work, \u201cDHS Secretary Kristi Noem has been reassigned under the bus. So let\u2019s bring her out to give her a proper goodbye.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ashley Padilla<\/a>, as Noem, then took the stage to set the record straight. \u201cI just want to make it clear that I didn\u2019t get fired, I self-deported,\u201d she said. \u201cAnd though I may be leaving this job, I will not be ending my mission. As I told my plastic surgeon, the work is never done.\u201d<\/p>\n

She then quipped, \u201cBut I gave my all to the DHS, and I have no regrets. Because like they say, you miss 100% of the dogs you don\u2019t shoot.\u201d<\/p>\n

Additionally, Noem said she was \u201cproud of what we\u2019ve accomplished.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI took this job with the goal of securing our border, deporting thousands of illegals, and spending $200 million on ads of me riding a horse. And I think I really nailed it,\u201d she explained. \u201cAnd by \u2018it,\u2019 I mean my married coworker in a big, beautiful flying bedroom 30,000 feet over Minneapolis.\u201d<\/p>\n

Noem continued, \u201cAnd while I look forward to what comes next, leaving is bittersweet. But the time has come for me to turn in my badge, bun, lips, lashes, teeth, and forehead.\u201d<\/p>\n

Finally, she mentioned her new role as special envoy for \u201cThe Shield of the Americas,\u201d<\/a> which Trump created.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis may be goodbye, but this isn\u2019t goodbye forever,\u201d Noem said, to which Hegseth popped back into the frame and pointed out, \u201cYeah, except that it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

Neom replied, \u201cOh, OK,\u201d before both Jost and Padilla exclaimed, \u201cAnd live from New York, it\u2019s Saturday Night!\u201d<\/p>\n

Saturday Night Live, Saturdays at 11:30 p.m. ET on NBC<\/strong><\/p>\n

Read the latest entertainment news on TV Insider<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"The Saturday Night Live\u00a0cold open lambasted President Donald Trump and Secretary of War Pete Hegseth over the war…\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":641310,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[30],"tags":[43326,69,171,83,2399,257816,6986,44316,228895,173,67,132,68],"class_list":{"0":"post-641309","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-tv","8":"tag-colin-jost","9":"tag-donald-trump","10":"tag-entertainment","11":"tag-iran","12":"tag-kristi-noem","13":"tag-papa-roach","14":"tag-pete-hegseth","15":"tag-saturday-night","16":"tag-secretary-of-war","17":"tag-tv","18":"tag-united-states","19":"tag-unitedstates","20":"tag-us"},"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"https:\/\/pubeurope.com\/@us\/116194514409245576","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/641309","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=641309"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/641309\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/641310"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=641309"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=641309"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=641309"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}