Netflix\u2019s eight-part reality series Blue Therapy follows seven couples as they navigate their relationships with the help of therapist Karen Doherty.<\/p>\n
The fly-on-the wall documentary, which centres on therapy sessions and the couples\u2019 interactions in the real world, covers issues including infidelity, dishonesty, financial difficulty, and parenting.<\/p>\n
Couples therapist and relationship coach Doherty said the show was exactly like her day job.<\/p>\n
\u201cI had no contact with them [the couples] other than the six hours of therapy that I did with them,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe whole show is based on the premise that the therapist gets to know what she finds out in that moment and responds appropriately there and then. We all stuck to that format.<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t really have to do anything with them outside of therapy and the production team was so brilliant. The room they created was even just like one of my consulting rooms.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI think everybody involved was surprised,\u201d Doherty says. \u201cThe contributors had come in and had these issues, but I don\u2019t think they really expected to be so vulnerable.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\n But once the three of us got going in what felt like a very safe space, the magic happened and it worked. You didn\u2019t hear or see the cameras. It was just like my day job.\n <\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s about getting couples talking to see each other, see what\u2019s going on, unpacking resentment, then getting them communicating and connecting again.\u201d<\/p>\n
Couples therapy is effective, adds Doherty.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt creates an opportunity for couples to hear each other and a therapist can create a space that is safe enough for people to hear each other, not just move to their patterns of fighting or bickering or falling back on old arguments,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t tolerate that in the room. It\u2019s actually a great space and I think the show democratised therapy and the idea that anybody can go to therapy and get something out of it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Here are the signs that couples may need therapy.<\/p>\n
\u201cBickering that goes on over the same things, all these superficial bits, they are all indicators of something much more profound going on underneath.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n People don\u2019t hear each other and they don\u2019t communicate effectively, and the assumptions one makes about the other can be so offbeat and wrong.\n <\/p>\n
Inability to communicate is especially common among people who are neurodivergent.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt happens where somebody who is overwhelmed and can\u2019t speak is thought of as ignoring or rejecting somebody, or stonewalling them. But, actually, they\u2019re just so emotionally dysregulated and they can\u2019t actually put words together because their executive function [mental processes] is compromised.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOnce the couple becomes deprioritised like that, there\u2019s an issue, because you\u2019re never bridging that gap.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou have to look at intimacy,\u201d Doherty says. \u201cIf that is broken down, what is going on?<\/p>\n
\n By intimacy, I mean in a range of different connections. But if sex and intimacy is broken down, you need to ask: Did you sign up to be flatmates or is there something missing?\n <\/p>\n
\u201cThis is a key sign a conversation needs to happen.\u201d<\/p>\n
A common theme within Blue Therapy was the reluctance among some couples to attend therapy, but there are ways to approach this, too.<\/p>\n
\u201cYour partner may not want to go, but, realistically, it\u2019s not going to get better. That\u2019s the first thing to remind them of and then ask them: \u2018Do we want to stay like this?\u2019,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cThen, what you can do is simply have an introductory call with a therapist.<\/p>\n
\u201cLots of them do these initial consultations and, I can guarantee, you and your partner will both take something out of that. \u201c<\/p>\n
Doherty says many couples really need help at the moment: \u201cIt\u2019s a very complex time for modern relationships. They\u2019re navigating new environments that have never been navigated and the old models are not necessarily equipped to deal with the new challenges that couples are facing.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ve got this hyper-connectedness and confusion over identities. You\u2019ve got men in crisis everywhere. It\u2019s a completely different environment, where roles are up for discussion.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m, hopefully, one of those therapists looking at it through that lens,\u201d Doherty says.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Netflix\u2019s eight-part reality series Blue Therapy follows seven couples as they navigate their relationships with the help of…\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":678138,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[210,95033,517,67,132,68],"class_list":{"0":"post-678137","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-mental-health","8":"tag-health","9":"tag-life-advice","10":"tag-mental-health","11":"tag-united-states","12":"tag-unitedstates","13":"tag-us"},"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"https:\/\/pubeurope.com\/@us\/116283743607480324","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/678137","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=678137"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/678137\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/678138"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=678137"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=678137"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=678137"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}